Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Randomize
