? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Help. Why am I so naked?
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