They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
My bed smells like the plague
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
