Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
