WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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