I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
