She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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