she was so not down for the gang bang
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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