we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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