Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
