Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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