I'm lost and stupid without you.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Randomize
