If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
