Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize