after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
