he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I will pee on everything he values.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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