yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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