if you like me you must not know who I am
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
