He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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