Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I had to cum in my sink.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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