Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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