Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Church boner. Awkwardddd
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
