just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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