That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
