belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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