What a fucking waste of an outfit
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize