k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
