Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
