his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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