Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Randomize
