Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize