Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
