i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Randomize
