But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
my shit smells like andre
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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