How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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