The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
