question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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