got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
