people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
