The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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