I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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