At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
