does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Randomize
