Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
