If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
and you fell through a lawn chair
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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