you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I am naked and annoyed.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
