She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
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