I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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