is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
