There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
